MEANINGFUL DISTRACTION

Not all of Europe is thrilled that Barack Obama is gracing their continent with his celestial presence this week. France’s paper of record, Le Monde, published a less-than-glowing editorial today about the globe-trotting Democratic nominee for President.

Le Monde hits Obama on multiple fronts, and our good friend Ben Smith has more on the piece HERE.

But I want to highlight one grievance in particular that the French mega-paper has: the lack of time Obama spends this week in France relative to Germany.

Le Monde’s editors write: “A speech in Germany, five little hours in France.”

But when you think about it, from a political standpoint, Obama choosing Germany over France for his major speech should come as a surprise to …let me see … oh that’s right… precisely no one.

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Saint John McCain is having a pretty crappy week since his buddy Barack Obama left for the Middle East and Europe.

Obama’s globe-trotting around the world, shaking hands with heads of state, schmoozing with our troops, and preparing to give a speech tomorrow before a crowd that may grow as large as 1 million people in Germany…

Meanwhile, here in the United States no one is paying attention to John McCain. One reporter showed up to greet his plane in New Hampshire this week. ONE!!!

But the fact that no one cares what McCain does or says right now may end up being a blessing in disguise for the presumptive Republican nominee for president, since he’s been especially prone to completely moronic statements innocent campaign gaffes since Obama left the country.

(1) First, the Master of Foreign Policy can’t stop talking about a country that hasn’t existed in well over a decade (Czechoslovakia).

(2) Then his campaign acts like a bunch of whiny teenagers by releasing an ad about how the media “goes soft on Obama.” But in typical John McCain fashion, hours later he flip flops on the ad and says he’s in fact not complaining about the media coverage of this campaign.

(3) Then he gives an interview with Katie Couric where he gets the most basic historical facts wrong involving a foreign policy decision that he’s choosing to basically hang his campaign on at this point: The Surge in Iraq.

ABC covers up McCain’s embarrassing historical illiteracy on what’s supposed to be his signature issue (National Security) because, after all, they are part of the same media that’s “in the tank” for Obama.

(4) Then his campaign decides to take the lowest road possible and hit Obama for visiting a Holocaust memorial site in — of all places — Israel! Another classy move.

So at this point John McCain’s campaign is so desperate to make headlines of their own that they’ve had to resort to planting false stories with reporters about McCain announcing his VP choice this week just to create a news cycle buzz.

BUT, as shit begets shit, Robert Novak, the reporter who thought he was given McCain’s VP super-scoop, was so angry and frustrated over being used like a piece of prison ass by the McCain campaign that he zoned out and hit a pedestrian while driving his black Corvette this morning.

So now we come to this afternoon: John McCain had one press avail scheduled for today. Just one.

But realizing that he’s going to be hammered by reporters over the smattering of negative stories circling his campaign right now (see 1-4), he chose to do the honorable thing… and really show Americans why he’s the only man worthy of the title, “Mr. Straight Talk”: he canceled the freakin’ press conference.

Someone should change the new campaign slogan on John McCain’s poster from “PEACE IS BORN OF WISDOM” to “PEACE IS BORN OF…DUCKING THE HARD QUESTIONS.”

Meaningful Distraction says to John McCain: Come back and face the music, cause your shit is WEAK right now!

Note the ethereal glow coming from McCain’s forehead.

“PEACE IS BORN OF WISDOM.” What a load of BS coming from John McCain.  The GOP favors neither Peace nor Wisdom.

Related: NEW JOHN MCCAIN CAMPAIGN POSTER!!

The above left graphic is Barack Obama’s campaign poster which publicizes (in German) the major address he will make tomorrow in Berlin.

Predictably, once the flyers came out looking “different” from what we’re used to seeing, the Republicans started to throw around their new favorite attack word for Obama: “arrogant.”

They love using it — these days Obama can’t brush his teeth in the morning without the Republicans telling us how the flavor of toothpaste he uses somehow reveals how “breathtakingly arrogant” he is.

“Arrogant,” after all, is the new “uppity.”

But here’s what the Republicans and even some moderate voices are missing: this campaign poster isn’t evidence of a “messiah” complex; it pays homage to a pivotal era in graphic design history: the German Bauhaus movement during the early 20th century (see above right for example).

As I’ve noted elsewhere, Obama’s design team is very, very good — they would know the history of German graphic design. Obama’s Berlin poster contains the same bold, diagonal lines and sanserif type which typifies 1920s -era German “industrial design.” Another example here.

So before the pundits and professional GOP douchebags operatives try to point to Obama’s German flyer as evidence of arrogance, they should take a minute to stop and think whether or not his design team sat down before creating yet another elegant image and said: “When in… Germany, do as the Germans do.”

Many Germans will recognize this little tip-of-the-hat, and those that recognize it will appreciate it. This type of move wouldn’t even occur to the McCain campaign, despite the fact that McCain was born around the time when German Bauhaus was all the rage.

Related:

OBAMA’S VIZ MAKES GRAPHIC ARTISTS SWOON

BAM 1 MILLION STRONG IN GERMANY?

EUROPEANS ARE THE NEW GAYS

OBAMA RE-TOOLS PRESIDENTIAL SEAL, SLAPS MCCAIN AROUND

OBAMA GOING TO IRAQ

A few updates on the “Did Batman beat his momma?” drama.

Bale is trying to get out in front of the story by having a “source close to the actor” relay his version of what happened over the weekend.

(1) Bale, who has already denied assaulting his mother and sister, does admit to getting angry with his family and blames his mother for his outburst. The anonymous Bale-friendly “source” with knowledge of the situation spoke to Mail Online, claiming:

“Christian was stressed, but he didn’t lay a finger on anyone. Instead, he flew off the handle and cussed his mother. He just got very loud because his mother was saying some very outrageous things about him, and his wife.”

The same source also claims that Bale’s temper owes in part to a deep depression he’s been feeling over the death of his friend Heath Ledger.

(2) But TMZ is also reporting that Bale’s fiery disposition was in full force last week as well. On the set of Terminator 4, TMZ’s spies claim that the 34 year old actor blew up at the film’s director of photography, screaming: “I will kick your ass” along with some “other choice remarks.”

(3) Today’s NYPost digs up a quote from Bale where he once told E! Online: “If everyone really knew what a jerk I am in real life, I wouldn’t be so adored in the slightest.”

(Conclusion) From where I stand it seems like, when the cameras are off, Christian Bale is just a miserable guy with a bad temper. I have no doubt that he blew up at his family this weekend and I wouldn’t even be surprised to find out that he did put his hands on them.

But what’s most interesting about this story is: how did the police get involved? Bale’s family is trying to tamp down the story, and they are expressing curiosity as to who notified the authorities.

Let’s say Bale did get rough with his mom. Shameful thing to do. But does mom then call the police on her son, knowing what it might do to his career?

Related: DID BATMAN BEAT HIS MOMMA?

[Photo: Batman star Christian Bale leaving the London police station after nearly 5 hours of interrogation]

Barack Obama and John McCain will soon be immortalized in comic books.

On October 1, a group called IDW Publishing will release two graphic novels called Presidential Material designed to “take advantage of one of the true American art forms, the comic book, to explore the histories of both presumptive nominees for the Democratic and Republican parties.”

Since Lark and me get enough entertainment from the real-life events of this campaign, Meaningful Distraction will take a pass on buying the comics. But I must say, in terms of cover art alone, John McCain won out big time here — just look at the difference between the two men’s hands alone!

Leaving aside the fact that everyone knows Obama has much bigger hands than McCain, without question the illustrator took some creative liberties with the diminutive Republican nominee: he slimmed down McCain’s stomach, filled him out with a bulging chest and arms, and gave him Barack’s signature Colgate Smile — which everyone knowns McCain doesn’t possess.

Meanwhile Obama looks small and angry (dare I say bitter?) in a deceptively misleading cover that does nothing to showcase his enormous height advantage over McCain, which you’ll see in the upcoming debates stands at nearly a full foot.

(Presidential Material)

The legendary actress who gave us so many hilarious moments passed away today at the age of 84.  She had been battling dementia for years.

Rest in peace Sophia.

With pretty much everyone’s attention focused right now on whether or not Christian Bale did one of these to his mom and sister, can anyone guess which American President The Dark Knight’s director, Christopher Nolan, looked to for inspiration before shooting his Bat-films?

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John McCain’s campaign released this compilation video to show how “in love” the media is with Barack Obama. I suppose the video would be more effective if 90 percent of the clips weren’t of Chris Matthews — someone we’ve all determined by now is a complete and utter tool.

But I think the larger point is: the McCain people are acting like a bunch of whiners right now. And it’s sad.

They’re having to fight for attention because exactly no one is excited about the prospect of a McCain Administration and they’re bitter over it. They resent their situation; they resent the fact that McCain doesn’t attract ratings and can’t get it up even with the Republican base.

Well, MD has a message for the McCain campaign: “boo-fucking-hoo.“

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Conservative host of Savage Nation, Michael Savage is a major moron in general, but his latest antics of idiocy are aimed at children suffering from a terrible and debilitating disease and they are inexcusable.

Above is the clip of Savage calling kids afflicted with autism “fakers” who are merely acting out like “fools,” and blaming parents for not raising them “correctly.”

This obviously riled many people and yesterday protesters rallied outside of his office calling for him to be fired.  But instead of backing down and apologizing, Savage defended his remarks saying:

“My comments about autism were meant to boldly awaken parents and children to the medical community’s attempt to label too many children or adults as ‘autistic.’ Many children are being victimized by being diagnosed with an “illness” which may not exist in all cases. … Let the truly autistic be treated. Let the falsely diagnosed be free.”

How about we let him be free instead, by firing his cruel and ignorant ass.  Sign petitions against him, here.

UPDATE: Bale denies the charges.

UPDATE II: for more see, BATMAN STAR CHRISTIAN BALE: “EVERYONE HAS A DARK SIDE”

Batman star Christian Bale was arrested and questioned today in London by the police. He’s being accused of assault…by his mother and sister.

According to AP: “His mother and sister reportedly complained that the 34-year-old actor assaulted them at a west London hotel on Sunday.”

The police failed to interrogate him on Monday because it would have interfered with his mega-premiere of Dark Knight in London. That was nice of them.

Click through for the full story.

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Barack Obama is in the Middle East today ahead of his trip through England, France and Germany. To give you a sense of what may be in store for Obama once he arrives, officials in Berlin, Germany, are preparing for a crowd of up to one million to show up to hear Barack Obama speak in a few days. A staggering prospect.

But remember how the politics of this will play out here at home: the bigger the crowds Obama draws overseas, the more John McCain’s campaign will tell us that Europeans hate America. That way, by their tortured logic, Barack Obama also hates America. See how neatly that works out!

Related:

EUROPEANS ARE THE NEW GAYS

OBAMA GOING TO IRAQ

A SUNDAY MORNING HANGOVER MEANS YOU GET SUNDAY MORNING BLURBS

UPDATE: Ben Smith, Radar and Gawker join the chorus.

New Rule: From now on whenever I hear a statement dripping with incoherence, or one that’s clearly motivated by a compulsion to overcompensate for artistic impotence… I’m going to call it an “Apollo Braun.”

I gave this dial tone what I thought would be his one and only post here on Meaningful yesterday, and under normal circumstances I have a hard and fast rule in blogging: “don’t feed the beast douche.” But my girlfriend’s reaction last night to Braun’s “OBAMA IS MY SLAVE” shirt has changed that.

The shirt was offensive enough on its own she said — but what really boiled her blood was the fact that she feels (as a Jew) like Braun’s financial exploitation of historical rifts between the Black and Jewish communities makes him even more detestable than your standard issue no talent opportunist. And she’s right.

So I decided to do a little digging and discovered a few things about Apollo Braun:

(1) much like a whore, Braun will do or say anything if the end result is he gets paid,

(2) he has the intellectual acquisitiveness common to a pistachio nut (see below), and

(3) judging by his work (which I refuse to link to), the guy doesn’t even have a pulse when it comes to artistic ability

Below is Braun talking about what inspired his “Obama = Hitler” shirt.

Normally I’d choose to wipe my ass with rants like this before posting them on Meaningful (and don’t think for a second that I’m not conflicted about giving this guy any more blog ink) but my compelling interest here is: if Apollo Braun ever makes the news again I want our readers to know just how small and sad this man really is.

Braun:

“I have an incredible imagination, you can call it a Jewish imagination if you want and it is what it is, Obama reminds me of Hitler in more ways than I can explain…

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Calling out Michelle for her “proud of America,” quote has been going on since May and now there is this new ad from the Washington State GOP. 

But c’mon already.  Isn’t it time for them to get a new tactic?  Like perhaps, the issues or even focusing on the positive aspects of McCain’s record that voters would be interested in.  Just a suggestion.

Related:

FIGHT BACK AGAINST FOX’S MICHELLE OBAMA SLANDERS

KEEPING AN EYE OUT FOR MICHELLE

FOX NEWS: MICHELLE OBAMA = BARACK’S “BABY MAMA”

FISTBUMPGATE: ED HILL GETS BUMPED!

WHAT IS IT: A FIST BUMP, POUND… “TERRORIST FIST JAB?”

THE ONLY FIGHT LEFT WORTH FOLLOWING IS MICHELLE v CINDY

DUELING FIRST LADIES, THE WIVES ON THEIR POTENTIAL ROLES

DUELING POTENTIAL FIRST LADIES: TIM GUNN ON TEAM MICHELLE

Before Barack Obama announced his candidacy for President few people had heard the term “State Senator,” much less were familiar with what a person in that position does. One of the lesser talked about consequences of Obama’s rise to superstardom is the spotlight that’s been placed on state legislators — who they are and what type of experience they’re able to gain from that role.

All this talk has invigorated State office holders across the nation, including here in New York, where some have begun to chart the local talent’s growth potential on something called “The Obameter.”

The Obameter rates up-and-comers in three main areas: Style, Substance and Savvy, with a panel of consultants and experts assessing state politicians’ strengths and weaknesses on a scale seen below.

The Obameter is mainly for fun; a cute talking point that politicians can send to their pro-Obama consitituents. But Obama broke the traditional mold in terms of how someone gets to be a major party standard-bearer, so it’s highly likely that we’ll see more state office holders at least try to make bold moves using Barack Obama’s campaign as a historical precedent.

Just one more for the list of improbable paranoias.

Some little girls want to be princess or the President, while some just want to grow up to be hookers.  Right?

In Mattel’s poorly thought out attempt to jump on the superhero craze, their new doll based on  the D.C Comics’ character Balck Canary, is pissing the hell out of Christian groups.  And while I never thought I would agree with anything they had to say, I am backing them on this one.

Outfitted in fishnets and leather, this is a straight up S&M.  When little girls play with this, will they have her hang out in the Barbie Mansion dishing with her buddies about Ken, or will she be tying him to a pink bed post and whipping him? 

UPDATE I: See also, “APOLLO BRAUN” IS A NO TALENT BITCH

UPDATE II: Gawker is reporting that the editor of Metro (the free daily that broke this “story”) has been fired, ostensibly for shoddy journalism.

An Israeli-born t-shirt “designer” named Apollo Braun (pictured above) is being sued by a woman who bought a shirt of his that reads “OBAMA IS MY SLAVE.”

The woman, a 25 year old Manhattan graduate student, was assaulted Tuesday night when a group of four teenage girls saw her wearing the shirt and took offense. According to Metro, the girls cursed at her, pushed her, then followed her around Union Square as one of the girls pulled the earphones out of her ears and another spit in her face.

Now the woman is suing the designer, not the four teens (!), for in his words, “all he’s got.”

Braun, real name Doron Braunshtein, claims that what allegedly happened to this woman is not his fault, and that the offensive design doesn’t reflects his views but “those of ordinary WASPs.” He says, “For a lot of people, when they see Obama, they see a slave. People think America is not ready for a black president.”

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Not sure how I missed this when I posted a couple days ago on the slew of new programs HBO is rolling out next year, but there’s another HBO pilot due out in September that’s getting some early buzz because of the nature of its marketing campaign.

Desperate for a new hit program but unable to revisit the lives of hypersexual Manhattan singles or overweight East Coast mobsters, HBO’s new show will revolve around… (wait for it) … VAMPIRES!!!

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I can’t decide which visual I like best: the prissy, unicorn-riding Barack Obama or the swollen-faced, bikini chasing Bill Clinton; one thing’s for certain though — this video is the most we’ve seen of Hillary Clinton in weeks.

(JibJab)

Yeah, that’s right.  Scott, who is currently sitting on death row for killing his pregnant wife Laci and dumping her body in the San Francisco Bay, is on the Internet discussing his thoughts and displaying pictures of him and his dead wife.

The blog was given to Scott by the Canadians Against the Death Penalty in hopes that it will eventually change the law for the death penalty. 

While part of me thinks this is fair because inmates should be able to exercise of their free speech, another part of me thinks this is just wrong and cruel to the victims families.

Thoughts?

Click here to read Scott’s blog.

There’s an old saying: the bigger the lie, the harder people believe.

John McCain is just a bad guy. Period. And the biggest lie of this election is that he is an honorable, straight shooter.

We already know that McCain was a serial adulterer who left his first wife for a rich trophy blonde after a horrific car accident resulted in part of his first wife’s leg needing to be cut off.

And my girl Lark already wrote about the impolite joke John McCain made about having stopped “beating his wife” only a few weeks ago.

Then he makes light of killing Iranians — which in addition to being a huge feather in the cap of American Diplomacy — also forced a response from the Iranian government.*

And of course, under no circumstances did McCain ever even dream about calling his wife a, QUOTE, “trollop-faced cunt.”

Now we come to a joke McCain is said to have told involving rape and an ape.

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(Via Animal)

This one featuring The McCains was rejected.

Either “satire” about alcoholism, drug addiction, old age and insanity is a “no no,” or the folks at The New Yorker reasoned (correctly) that since no one is paying attention to John McCain this year it would be better to satirize the Obamas on race, religion, and the murder of millions of Americans.

(from 2 Political Junkies)

Related:

THE NEW YORKER’S OBAMA COVER

OBAMA & MCCAIN REACT TO NEW YORKER COVER

Remember that underwhelming response John McCain gave to a question about why he supports health insurance companies covering Viagra but not birth control? Well, apparently his embarrassing display didn’t sit well with the gals over at Planned Parenthood, who just cut an ad targeted at women who use(d) birth control informing them of McCain’s (non)position on the matter.

As far as political attack ads go, this one is pretty tepid. BUT, check out where Planned Parenthood is running this spot — during Project Runway on Bravo, Army Wives on Lifetime, and Oprah in some markets. Planned Parenthood must figure this will be red meat for those audiences.

Related: SOME ISSUES HIT TOO CLOSE TO HOME: JOHN MCCAIN DODGES VIAGRA QUESTION